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Where's The Respect?
Christian thoughts on every day parenting.
by Donna Shepherd
All materials copyrighted
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However, each one of you also must love his wife
as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
-- Ephesians 5:33
I suppose I’m as guilty as the next person. Some of my favorite television sitcoms feature men, and more specifically husband and dads,
portrayed as bumbling and goofy. The moms have to swoop in, clean up after their messes, and get them back on track. Even the children
show little respect for the fathers on these shows.
As Christians, we’ve been called to a higher standard of conduct within our marriages. We wives have a direct command from God
concerning how we are to treat our husbands. "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must
respect her husband" (Ephesians 5:33).
Marriage is a relationship designed and created by God as a gift to us. As a family, we can strengthen the family unit by showing
respect for all its members.
Sometimes we get together with our girlfriends and, over coffee, start listing our husbands’ faults. I count myself guilty. I’ve also
heard wives speak to their husbands like they were children. Now, I admit, we all exhibit childish behavior at times, but your children
want and need to look up to and admire their father. It won’t help if you belittle and scold him like a child. Proverbs 14:1 says,
“The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.”
Let’s build our spouses up, not tear them down. Be wise with your words. They hold great power. In Proverbs 16:23-24, wise Solomon
said, “A wise man's heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction. Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and
healing to the bones.”
Let’s make our speech pleasant and use our words productively by edifying and praying for our husbands. Ask God to help you find ways
to honor him in your marriage. A man who respects himself, will respect others.
Remember when you first got married, and you thought his quirks were charming? After a few years, it’s tempting to criticize or make
fun of behavior different from our own. Resist that urge. Nobody deserves that type of treatment. Putting your husband down or making
fun of your husband in front of your children does nothing but diminish him in their eyes. God made each person in His image, and we
are all unique. Let’s be gracious and kind.
Perhaps you’re thinking, but my husband does nothing that deserves respect! It seems as if it’s human nature to rise to the level of
the respect received. Have you ever noticed how your spouse’s chest puffs out when you brag on him? Don’t be stingy with compliments
and the words ‘thank you.’ I know when my husband appreciates and respects me, I work even harder to please him. Somebody needs to make
that first move towards a more loving attitude. Ask God to give you grace. That somebody is you!
BUSY Parents Tip
Moms, tonight at dinner or before bed, gather your family to pray. Take your husband’s hand. Thank God for the love you share, and for the family with which God has blessed you. Then thank God specifically for your husband. Be prepared to shield your eyes – you husband might start beaming!
About The Author:
Donna J. Shepherd is the author of Topsy Turvy Land
and a contributing author to Anytime Prayers for Everyday Moms.
From bird watching to the Beatitudes, her writing touches the heart with wisdom and humor while feeding the mind with
daily portions of God's Word. Read more of her writing at Donna J. Shepherd.
Information provided in this column is for entertainment purposes only.
The information in this column is not meant to be taken as legal, medical, or professional advice.
Read legal disclaimer.
* This column is available for your publication, for a F-E-E.
This column may NOT be reprinted without monetary compensation and written permission from the author.
For reprint rights or comments/questions about this article, please contact the author.
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